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Who will you share a beer with?(of Projections and reflection..)

Posted 22nd November 2015 at 10:43 AM by babe!

Who will you share a beer with?(..of projections and reflections)

As part of my exercise to put a face behind the anonymity of online members on this forum i ask my self if given as little as a 15 minutes break from my existential activities who would i share a bottle of beer with from this esteemed online community? No, i don't drink its just a form of expression for who i think i have something to learn from the most or who you will like to mentor you(if you are still young at heart).

Perhaps, before i reveal my own answer i should say this exercise may have an indirect benefit of providing valuable feedback to you about yourself. Back in teenage years its easy to ask your best buddy- do you like me? what do you like about me? what do you hate about me? and those types of silly questions. etc and then receive valuable feedback in the process.

As one grows up and tend to assume leadership positions it becomes almost impossible to ask those types of silly questions again. They just appear too vain, or useless. People assume there will be repercussion if they give you their honest opinion!!

Imagine you, as a presidents, governors, Md's or as a pastors or even as the CBN governor, with all the powers at your disposal, who dare give you their honest opinion of you? the only people brave enough to do so are already your enemy who in their jaundice view of you will probably be extremely bias. i sometimes shuddered at the thought of President GEJ reading his own Facebook pages littered with curses or reading the state of the nation thread on this forum where abysmal, and perhaps unfair, low opinion of him has been routinely expressed. Comments and criticism can be so destructively that the only reaction possible from it is a self-preserving "i don't give a damn"!

However, a honest feedback, in the context of a warm, trusting and respectful relationship aid us to see ourselves, like in a mirror, as we truly are. it is why psychotherapy work, not minding its many other theories, principles and techniques- a honest feedback in the context of a warm trusting and respectful relationship.

some leaders seems to depend on their intuitions as a form feedback for their actions, believing, that intuition is from some higher powers. The advantage of intuition is also its worse limitation. it is personal, of unknown source, often faith-based and subtle, such that if you are not matured or well discipline, it can be easily ignored time and time again.

of course you can tell yourself you are perfect and do not need any feedback. self confidence is important but the feeling that you don't need feedback may reflect the depth of your prejudice and biases.

so back to my little mind exercise, of this esteemed community comprising (in no particular order) ogas- wanajo, omydee, waan5, hipsy99, bivns1, afolabi27, eniyanman, oracle, salida, kod, nosa2, waves, pumping,malamiman, picolena66, migiets, emmanuel ewumi, kokoko,etc who is my pick and what will it say about me?

i narrowed it down to 4 members;

Oga waan5. why? i don't know what part of oga waan5 posts always come across to me as full of conviction, contentment and humility but those are things i readily pick up in his post. Maybe my life lacked any conviction, contentment and humility at the moment, or maybe those values are stuff i'd like my life to be based on.

Oga omydee. i once made an innocuous post, and gbam i got a good e-knock on the head. my gut feeling is that rather than for the post itself, some how,oga omydee got a unique blink moment. I missed an invite to meet in person some time ago. I envy is Library, and what those books have done to his mind.

Oga oracle. why? Do i need to explain? i doubt if there's any one on earth with his sense of humor. He sees the humorous side of things always. i have a feeling that if he were to be left alone in the arctic, or under the dry ice, he will still feel warm inside and make jokes of the penguin! Desperately needed for me after some mind-bending encounter with some of my clients is his type of light perception on issues. maybe it is the comfort of the NRC compound that brings those bountiful gift of the heart...

Oga nosa2. why? simply because his posts has filled me with the most indignation. i once research online for 6hrs straight trying to write an article to refute his claim that Nigerians are tribalistic, and it was this tribalism that is largely responsible for the Nigerian Civil war. The article is unfinished yet, but my findings basically can be summarized by Hanlons razor.."never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity".
The other time, he suggested that young Nigerian graduate are silly looking for jobs that don't exist. he said they could go into agriculture,that some southwest government are giving land for farming out for free.
i was shocked. Mollified. Petrified. Stupefied. By the comment.
i thought Agriculture is capital intensive and i wonder what the graduates will 'eat' pending the long gestation period. well, like they say on numerous online forum..google is your friend. so i googled. i was equally shocked to realize there are some opportunities in the sector for small niche-players. In fact i know a few farmers now making good money.
So whenever am outraged by his post, i often back-tracked and examine my own assumptions and orientations. he is forced me to think about and re-examine my opinions. i wonder what more radical views i might get from just 15 mins with this great investor, and which of my assumptions they will strengthened or....change.

So of this 4; if i have just 15 minutes who will it be? guess!

Of course there are several esteemed registered members on this site and it has been immensely rewarding getting to learn (and share) from the contributions on this forum.

i will continually hope more of this esteemed members keep a blog. In the mean time David smith of The Guardian has promised a treasure trove of blogs..Africa: a myriad different realities | World news | The Guardian

you might want to keep up with him...Africa: a myriad different realities | World news | The Guardian

thank you.


This blog entry was written 3 years ago. A little update is in order.

oga waan5: The last election in which GEJ lost has gone to reveal some other side of this great man. Clearly, i was imagining things with the humility part! still, a great gentle interesting mind.

oga omydee: i think he has gone off to run a very successful on-line store. Amazing stuff he's done really.

oga oracle: he's run off to Turkey, running things from there.

oga nosa: i did get more than 15-mins. Thanks to him the next series of blog posts will unravel soon. it will be about Strange Land Investments.

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